A Birth Story of a Different Variety

I have read so many wonderful birth stories lately and for a few weeks now I have been pondering how best to put mine into words. Mine are so very different from the kind I have been reading about and somehow don't seem like they belong in that same collection of stories! But in the end, I think I've come to the conclusion that as a mom, its important to write the story - not only to pass it on to your child, but to once again relive those moments. And as a child, one day, it will be so precious to have that story, no matter what flavor it was. I also feel like its important to share because, lets face it, not everyone ends up getting the water birth they dream about after seeing it on A Baby Story. I always figured it would be me, but in the end, I didn't have that choice. I think its wise to go into the situation with the understanding that only God knows your birth story - you may have your birth plan mapped out, but that baby is going to come how he or she is going to come... I learned that first hand (more than once!)... now on to the story..

Our first pregnancy was a surprise in itself. About 2 months into our marriage, I went into the doctor for something somewhat routine and somehow ended up finding out that there was some sort of anomaly with my female organs (they didn't know quite what at the time) and we were told that we would not be able to get pregnant and if we did by chance get pregnant, we would not carry the baby to viability. Huh. Imagine that in a new marriage!

Fast forward four years and we had just moved to Rochester, MN and begun looking into the reproductive issues to see what kind of trouble/process it would actually be for us to try to get pregnant.... and wouldn't you know?! There we are - pregnant! What?! We were followed obnoxiously closely by the high risk perinatologist team at Mayo (and I am so thankful we were - ultrasounds almost weekly!).  At our first ultrasound at 8 weeks, they gathered a team of about 9 people in the room and Steve was blushing SO hard as they did both kinds of ultrasounds and checked everything out - everyone in awe of the lady with weird parts and no one knowing just what to do with me. The doctor restricted me from any exercise and said we needed to get to 17 weeks and then go from there. Our next goal was 24 weeks... All of these milestones came and went! I had a book of ultrasound pictures to show for it ;) In the end, their team debated as to whether or not they should let me try to deliver vaginally or not - they weren't sure if it was possible due to my anatomy. Well, Josiah answered that question and showed up breech at 34 weeks. Because he was in a half-sized uterus, the doctor said it was too risky (and too painful) to try to rotate him, so he scheduled the c-section for 39 weeks.

The morning of the operation I was bouncing off the walls, and a bit fiesty (I was so hungry!). We were scheduled for 8am, but they had 2 emergency sections come first, so we didn't get in until 1pm. Hungrier yet! We hadn't decided on a name yet and the debate continued. Its a big deal, naming a person! They brought me in to give me the spinal and I couldn't understand why Steve couldn't come with. Why is that? But I didn't know to ask. (I learned after this round!) This spinal was the worst thing! The site numbing shot took NINE tries. NINE!! If you've had one before, you may know, but that is so awfull! Then the spinal kicks in and its totally fine, but still! I was squeezing that poor nurses hand right off. I cannot focus on curving my back "just right" so that it doesn't hit the wrong spot, and holding still while you continue to poke me! It would be much wiser to allow the husband in, dear nurse! Then the legs go numb and the world is happy again. They laid me down, got my upper half some warm blankets and thats all I really cared about :)

They brought Steve in, all decked out in his scrubs and cameras. They sliced open the belly, said I might feel some pulling but I didn't feel a thing. Then they warned us that the baby would be out in a minute - so we said "quick, what is his name going to be?!" and Steve said "Josiah?" and I said "sure" (we had a list of three) and out he came, peeing everywhere. They showed him to me over the "keep you from puking everywhere" curtain and then Steve vanished for quite some time. I chatted with the lovely nurse who had forgiven me for squeezing so hard. Steve came back after a bit and gave me the measurements and left again, returning a few minutes later with Josiah in hand and I got to hold him and kiss his red face. Pure Bliss.

Little did I know I was swelling up like a balloon! Pictures from the recovery area and from that day in my room show me with 20 pounds I didn't have from the moments before the operation. Clearly I took those IV fluids in or something! YIKES. SO I don't display those at home! But I was up and walking that afternoon, and enjoying every minute with this new, peaceful little bundle. Steve changed his first poopy diaper and wanted to video tape it! Those are the moments you want to remember. We sent Josiah to the hospital nursery that night knowing that it would be our last night of sleep for years to come. We talked about that nursery bill for a few years after that ;) Because I recovered so quickly, they sent us home a day early - and we both were so nervous, that they were allowing us to go home with this new baby. A little life we were now responsible for?! All they gave us were a few papers as a means of an instruction manual?! Somehow, we all survived :)

I have often said that I am glad I had a c-section, and I think that is really the truth. I don't know that I would have elected one, but perhaps for me it was good that I needed one? ;) I felt no pain - while I have a pretty high pain tolerance, I was able to be totally relaxed, laughing, chatting up Steve and the staff, etc. Another reason it worked well for me is that I recover well from surgeries - I was able to be up and moving that same day, which of course aided the recovery. I was able to cut my LOA short when I ended up going stir crazy, etc.. Had I been able to exercise during the pregnancy, I probably would have bounced back into my jeans better too ;) But truthfully, knowing I was not a candidate for the water birth I wanted, I don't think I would have wanted it any other way. I don't mind going through life not experiencing 48 hours of labor, not experiencing my water breaking, etc. I'm SO happy and thrilled for my lovely ladies that get to experience all of that!!! But I am content to live vicariously through all of you ;)